So much crap, so little time.
2 Oct 2006
The Average White Guy goes out of his way to express that he is not a bigot. He values diversity as much as the next guy. Now this does not inherently imply that I am extremely comfortable with all types of people. Take Al-qaeda operatives for instance: I hate those bastards. This also applies to homosexuals. I don’t want to spin off onto a bigger tangent here, but I don’t see how I can avoid it, so let this post address the term homophobia, and why I am not one…
When someone has a phobia, we say that person is afraid of something. Accurately defined based on the homo- prefix, and the -phobia suffix, the term homophobia means “fear of homosexuality”. I’ve been accused of being a homophopic (homophobe) in my day, for reasons you will learn in a few moments, but the fact is, I am not a homophobe. I’m not afraid of homosexuality, or homosexuals at all. In fact, according to all stereotypical data I can collect, homosexuals are typically more docile than heterosexuals. They’re much too worried about performing arts and boy bands to cause me harm. At least that’s what the stereotype says. In fact, according to the stereotype, I could probably kick just about every homo ass in America.
Well, this is certainly not true. If you paid attention, you read “stereotypical” and “stereotype” in the text. But lets not fool ourselves into thinking that only the straights stereotype. I’ve been accused of being homophobic, by homosexuals or sympathizers thereto. How stereotypical is that? Just because the very idea of homosexuality makes me sick on every level of my existence, does not mean I’m afraid. “Ok.” they say, “You’re just afraid of the lifestyle taking over, and becoming acceptable.” Well that’s not entirely true either.
I don’t like that homosexuality is becoming mainstream, and even a little bit trendy. I don’t like that this is the one principle taught in the Bible which makes people think twice about Christianity. I think it’s rediculous to have a gay-pride day, with parades and the like. I recall a specific Simpsons episode where the gay pride parade came down Evergree Terrace (the street where the Simpsons live). One of the guys in the parade said in his efeminite voice: “We’re here, we’re queer, get used to it!”, to which Lisa Simpson replies: “You do this every year….we are used to it!” Nobody could say it better. Just fuckin’ stop already. Let me be. Be yourself, but don’t expose me to things with which I am not comfortable, because then you are infringing on my civil liberties. Too bad the ACLU (which might just be my next topic!) won’t defend my civil liberties, because I’m registered Republican, and I’m not a minority.
Now I’m sure someone reading this is calling me a homophobe right now. Well I’m not. Dislike and fear are two separate, distinct things….don’t get them confused, and for God’s sake, stop using the word homophobia; it’s not fitting, and completely inaccurate. I’m proud of who I am, and what I am, but I don’t parade in the streets, and I don’t impose on you by using every available opportunity to remind you I’m straight. I don’t seek the gay community’s acceptance of my heterosexuality. Fuck them; I don’t care what they think. I don’t care what anyone thinks. That’s how it ought to be.
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2 Responses for "Homophobia"
[...] Do you believe that? Agree or disagree, you gotta be shocked with how eager he seemed to be about telling the world he’s a homophobic. See my previous article on homophobia for my thoughts on this matter. I’m sure “Timmy” would agree with me there. [...]
Well, now AWG, after enjoying your blog on stupid management buzzwords and then clicking around, I’m saddened to find this post. I can understand you taking issue with the literal meaning of the work homophobia, but it’s your underlying disdain for gays that’s unfortunate. I’m gay, so let’s just establish that as my point of view. Even I can laugh at Lisa Simpson’s comment – that’s funny (but then most of that show is funny).
There’s a reason gay people have Gay Pride and hold parades. It’s the same reason that back in the 1960’s, black civil rights leaders held rallies on the Mall and parades and walks throughout the South. The only way to effect change in society is to bring attention to your plight. Yes, we want to effect change – not to “convert” any to our lifestyle (we don’t care that 90% of you prefer each other) but to stop being the subject of systematic mass legal discrimination.
The Declaration of Independence states: We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal. But gay US citizens are not treated equally under the law. I pay into social security, unemployment insurance and federal income taxes every darn paycheck just like you. And someday, if you get real and marry your fiancé, she’ll reap the benefit of the funds you paid in. If I spend my life with the same woman (not your fiancé, mind you, but my girlfriend), she won’t. Why should I be paying in taxes to disproportionally benefit your fiancé? or anyone else? Married folks get tax breaks for filing jointly. We can’t. How’s that fair if we choose a person and faithfully spend our lives with him or her. Heck, you guys don’t even have to be faithful to qualify for the tax break! just ask Bill Clinton. Straight folks just need a piece of paper signed by a minister or judge to give them better financial treatment than we get. Oh, and let’s say my girlfriend is in a car wreck and in bad shape in the emergency room. Can I go visit after hours? Nope, not family to her – just a “friend” who’s not allowed after hours. How wrong if a human being dies alone cuz of a nonsensical law that keeps her chosen loved one away.
As to why the thought of homosexual conduct sickens you to your core, only you can address why you have such a strong reaction? But why even comment on our sexual behavior? – we don’t comment on yours. Some men find the notion of sticking their (male sexual organ) into a woman’s (female sexual organ) utterly revolting. That’s why they don’t do it. I can’t explain to you why one guy wants to and the next guy doesn’t. Trust me when I say to you (and everyone) being gay isn’t a choice. It’s something very deeply felt and known, and for most folks from very early on. We can’t explain to you why we’re attracted to the same sex and not the opposite sex – we just know we are. Why do some folks like broccoli or coffee or beans and others don’t? It’s just something you intuitively know it tastes good to you or it doesn’t. I don’t like coffee. I can try to describe why…I can say it’s “bitter” to me, but what does that mean? It’s not bitter to you. I can’t really make you understand how it tastes or feels to me and visa versa. Similarly, I don’t like the way most men smell (no offense intended). Other women find the smell of male body odor sexually invigorating. Why? I dunno….it just feels the way it feels to each of us.
BELIEVE ME, it’d be far easier to be straight. I could get all kinds of cool wedding gifts and then could invite my husband to company parties. My family would be really happy and supportive. I could get great tax breaks. And, I wouldn’t have to read anger-filled blogs against who I am as a person. But, you know, it’s just not me — and I and other openly out gay people choose not to live a lie. It’s unfortunate that in this country some people want to make anyone else feel bad for simply being true to who they are, and so long as they’re not harming anyone else, who cares? I don’t care that you want to have sex with your fiancĂ©, and doesn’t matter to me if you guys use toys or not, have anal sex or not. It’s your business. And our sex lives are our business. It’s private and consensual, and that’s the distinction. If you agree with Rick Santorum that being gay is in anyway equivalent to incest or child rape (both of which are harmful to others and neither of which is consensual), then that’s even sadder. Please, AWG, you seem too bright to fall into this sort of false thinking. It’s BELOW average mentality to not be able to make that sort of basic distinction. I actually contributed to his opponent even though I don’t even live in that state because he’s such an obvious hate-monger who had no place serving in my country, in my Congress. We the People. In this country, what two consenting adults do behind closed doors should be no one else’s business. Here’s a proposition for you: if you guys stop passing targeted discrimination laws keeping us from getting equal legal rights and benefits with and for our loved ones, then we’ll stop parading. Deal?
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