When I read this article (http://cbs4denver.com/local/local_story_064143252.html) about Denver utilizing parking meters for the homeless, I was disappointed. Although the concept in Denver is good, and it gives people the opportunity to donate to the poor, I think it’s lacking. I don’t mean to be cold-hearted here, but I think my idea is better…

Why not put up meters for the homeless? How is it different than in the article above? Well, what if there were designated “homeless spaces” throughout the city, where the homeless people used quarters to reserve the space for a time, just like most do with their car? If a homeless person is found to be in a space while the meter is expired, they’re cited. Also, parking your homeless ass in a space other than a metered space would constitute a citation.

This approach has a two-pronged affect. First, once all the non-homeless people learn where the meters are, they’ll know where not to go. Second, it will give the riff-raff something other than crack cocaine to spend their panhandled funds on.

Now I don’t know if the homeless folks pay taxes, but I certainly would like to see this go as a tax exemption if they do. It’s a business expense, right?

Ok, by now you’re saying that I’m a cold-hearted, emotionless bastard, right? Well, no. I’m honestly not. The homeless people in Pittsburgh are primarily addicts and drunkards, who would rather live high on the streets than live straight in a house. They’re lazy and inconsiderate people. I’m sure that mixed in there somewhere is a truly sad story. A guy or girl who really just never caught a break in life. Someone who could make it if they had the chance to get back in the game. Well, of the homeless in Pittsburgh, I’ll bet there’s one. My idea is for the rest of them.

One last thing while I’m talking about the homeless. Why would you stay in a cold weather climate if you were homeless? Shit, I could handle being homeless in a beach town. Why wouldn’t you move south if you suddenly found yourself homeless? The weather is warmer, the drugs are cheaper, and there are more people with more money than here in Pittsburgh. Be a tropical bum. Shower on the boardwalks at night after all the straights are sleeping, so  you’re clean to impress your “mark” the next morning. I’m baffled.