The Average White Guy

I can’t put these in any particular order, becuase they’re all so good in their own respects. I’ll try to classify them, so I can avoid the Top X Movies list. Here they are:

Teen/High School Movies
These are the cream of the 1980’s teen movie crop. Enjoy

• Fast Times at Ridgemont High - Making the list easily, considering how good of a movie it is. Even if the movie sucked, it’s got a topless Phoebe Cates, which automatically puts it in the list.
• The Breakfast Club - Another cult classic chock full of brat packers. It couldn’t have taken more than a weekend to film this movie, but it’s impression will be forever stamped into the fabric of time. Great Flick.
• Ferris Bueller’s Day Off - “Bueller…..Bueller……Bueller….Bueller”. HA! This one might be the best of them all.
• Say Anything - The boombox scene is recognizable to almost everyone. Although released in 1989, it’s got the 1984-1986 quality to it. A definite collection piece.
• Sixteen Candles - Another cult classic which can’t go unmentioned. There’s a character named “Donger”… that’s not staying off my list.

The Coreys
Haim and (or) Feldman…need I say more?

• The Lost Boys - This is a classic double-Corey movie. Vampire-infested beach town, cleansed of the night beasts by our two Coreys. Awesome!
• License to Drive - This one could have been classified as a Teen/High School Movie, but it’s better classified as a Corey movie. We’re also introduced to another hottie: Heather Graham. SWEET!
• Stand By Me  - Ok, not a dual-Corey flick, but a damn good one starring Feldman. You can’t go wrong with this movie.
• The Goonies - Another non-Haim’er, but how could you talk movies from the 80’s and not mention the Goonies?

The Supernatural/Sci Fi
The 1980’s brought on a slew of supernatural tales. Some were gore, some were comedy, but all of them were supernatural. Here’s the list.

• Weird Science - Two words: Kelly LeBrock
• Teen Wolf - MJF in a fine role as a warewolf in highschool. Could have made the Teen/High School list, but this is the better fit.
• Nightmare on Elm St. (parts 1-5) - Admittedly, the last one (part 6) sucked, but it was released in the 90’s so it doesn’t matter. Freddy Krueger still might be the most well-known horror figure in history.
• Back to the Future (I and II) - If you’re having a movie marathon night (which I like to do) then this is a good selection. Even though part III was done in the 90’s.
• Ghost Busters (1 & 2) - I’ll admit two is weak, but it’s still a good flick. Ghostbusters is a standard in this genre.
• The Empire Strikes Back & Return of the Jedi - Star Wars buffs wonder why these were listed fifth, but this is a no particular order list, so back off Tatooinians.
• War Games - The Average White Guy nominates this as the best movie ever (sarcastically of course). An artificially intelligent computer system, primed to launch nukes against the commies? YES!
• The Terminator - A no-brainer. Ahhhhhhnold as a cyborg, of course.
• Howard The Duck - A midget human-sized duck who flew to Earth on a barcalounger. A smash hit.
• Project X - Hey, I have an idea…let’s nuke some chimps and see what happens. Matthew Broderick chimes in with his second movie of the genre.
• Space Camp - Yeah, some summer space camp kids are really going to outerspace…right. It makes my list because I recall seeing it in the theater.
• Space Balls - You knew it would be here.
• The Serpent & the Rainbow - Another good Pullman movie. It’s about zombies and shit. Wild scary/realistic type stuff.

Epics/Blockbusters
The 80’s wasn’t known for the blockbusters like the 90’s was. But there were some stellars (which aren’t categorized elsewhere. The first entry should tell you about this category.

• The Princess Bride - One of my favorites of all-time. A great tale, told brilliantly.
• Rocky III and IV - Whoopins on Mr. T, and a Dolph Lungdren. Aaaaadrian!
• Raiders of the Lost Ark (I, II, & III) - Maybe one of the best trilogies I’ve ever seen. Harrison Ford was perfect.
• Beverly Hills Cop (I & II) - Most people say that number II was nowhere near as good as #1, but that’s a touch benchmark, since I was awesome. Two is worth seeing.
• Big Trouble in Little China - A wonderfully 80’s flick.
• Top Gun - Perhaps the quintessential blockbuster flick from the 1980’s. Tom Cruise in his pre-scientology days. You’ve seen it…don’t lie.
• Lethal Weapon (1 & 2) - Duh..
• Die Hard - Another instant classic. Poorly shot, bad effects, EXCELLENT ACTION!!!
• Taps - A little known blockbuster with an ALL-STAR cast…most of whom weren’t stars yet.
• Rain Man - Yeah….yeah, 247…definitely two hundred and forty seven.

Shoot ‘em Up/Hang Em High/Kick Some Ass
This category is all about the likes of Dirty Harry and Billy the Kid.

• Any Which Way You Can - A classic Clint Eastwood movie. Made me want to beat stuff up…and get an orangutang.
• The Dead Pool - Dirty Harry’s back in this one. Duck as you’re coming through the door.
• Young Guns - This is an 80’s list, remember…we need more brat pack inclusion.
• Billy the Kid - Aces ‘n Eights…the dead man’s hand. See it here.

Sports
You know there’s a ton here….let’s get started.

• Caddyshack - Hahahahaha..
• Bull Durham - An excellent tale of a minor league team from North Carolina.
• Raging Bull - The story of boxer Jake Lamotta.
• Major League - The Indians still suck,  but this movie makes it funny.
• The Natural - Maybe in my top 5 of all time.
• Field of Dreams - Another baseball classic.
• Eight Men Out - A not-so-often-remembered movie about the Chicago “Black Sox” scandal of 1919. Featuring Shoeless Joe Jackson.
• The Karate Kid - Yeah, you heard me. Remember, the 80’s were all about a whiney, sniveling, out of place protagonist. Boy, does Ralph Macchio fit this bill.
• Hoosiers - Of course it’s on this list.

I can’t believe how fast this list grew. There’s a ton more I’ve not mentioned. Maybe sometime soon I’ll build another list for the categories and movies I left out. Add some of your own here too.