The Average White Guy

Folks, it’s not easy to pull the wool over my eyes. I’m extremely intuitive, and as such, pranking me is a chore. I question everything, and I’m skeptical about most things, therefore I’m expecting surprises around every corner. It is possible to nail me though. Ask Natalie. She’s done it on a few occasions. I want to take time to tell  you about one of them, the most precious and special gift (yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I know….Life, Love, etc…but I mean “present”) I’ve ever received…all thanks to Natalie. 

It’s been about 4 weeks since I got one of the most finely-crafted guitars ever built. Natalie got me the Les Paul Supreme, which includes a top and back, carved from AAAA-grade flamed maple, which any luthier will tell you is the most beautiful wood you can use to finish a guitar. The fact that she got me the guitar was special, but that she surprised me, actually left me - me, The Average White Guy - speechless.

We were out with my Uncle Jim and Aunt Donna (as we are frequently) and decided to stop in on the Guitar Center in our area. It was later in the evening on Saturday. Figuring it’s a retail establishment like any other, it would be open until 9:00. Now neither Jim, nor I are “Guitar Center Rookies”; between the two of us, we’ve got 18 guitars from one of Pittsburgh’s two Guitar Center locations. We should have known (and because he’ll rip me to shreds here if I don’t metion it: Jim was pretty sure) that Guitar Center closes at 5:00pm on Saturdays.

I wasn’t really in the buying mood, but I hadn’t been there in a while, and there was a new amplifier from Epiphone I wanted to check out. Too bad the store was closed. Still in the mood to visit a guitar shop, we hopped back in the car, and rode the mile or so to Hollowood Music store. I’ve never purchased anything from this shop, and Jim had a rough buying experience once, so we had no plans to buy anything here either.

We walked in, and immediately went to the Les Paul rack. Now Jim’s got his Gibsons Guitars, but of the 15 I have…none were Gibson. I had my chances, but I figured I’d wait until the right guitar jumped off the wall and landed in my lap, refusing to be put down, unless it’s into a hard-shell case for transport back to the house. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, then you’re not a guitarist, otherwise you’d have experienced the feeling. As I’m looking at the guitars on the wall, I see one that appears to be staring at me. I have to ignore it, because I’m in no position to buy an expensive guitar. If I ignore it, maybe there won’t be a difficult decision on the near horizon. I walked away…into the used gear room. Nothing fancy. Nothing cool. Nothing really. As I’m walking back out, Natalie is staring up at the same guitar that stared me down at the door. She wanted me to check out the wood grain on it (the AAAA top and back). She’s a sucker for the aesthetics, but we guitar players know it don’t mean a thing if it doesn’t feel right.

I was basically backed into the corner here, but Jim, Donna, and Natalie all wanted the salesman to pull it down, so I asked him to bring it down. Now I knew I was in trouble. Since it’s down, I’ll have to play it. If I play it and I like it, I won’t want to put it back. This is why I didn’t want to pay it any mind.

So I’m sitting there playing it, and everyone in the store (which is us and the two sales guys) is checking it out. I feel like someone is asking me to say, “Let’s buy it.” I wasn’t going to say that. Natalie didn’t wait for me to say it. She said it for me. I immediately lost my train of thought, my ability to build cogent sentences, and almost walk. I was torn between “YES!!!!!! and NO - we can’t afford that.” I trembled. I was nervous. I was completely and utterly surprised. She had done it.

Well, I brought it home, and gave it about two good hours of play the first night I had it. It took the guitar about an hour to warm up to me. Yeah, you heard me right. Guitars DO have personality. Once we were acquainted, it was mine. It still didn’t feel like mine, but I knew it was. It took me a couple of days. It took a while for the “Hey, you have a Les Paul Supreme!” notion to sink in, but it’s here now, and I love the feeling.

This guitar is absolutely at the center of my collection, and will probably be there forever - no matter what else is still out there. I love it as much as I love anything else I’ve ever been give (again - not including life and love - JEEZ). If you’ve played this guitar (or even seen it in person), and you’ve not thanked Natalie for giving you the opportunity, then shame on you. For me, I can think of no better way to show my appreciation than by playing the ever-loving fucking hell out of it! Enjoy the photos